Turning around

These last few weeks have been very challenging!
My emotions which are usually very calm have been all over the place. I know this is part of my injury recovery process but I call "UNCLE!" I can not handle being this upset because life has changed so much. This summer I could see the positive outcome because I was so ill that I was on drugs as well as just wanting the pain to end. Now I am cranky that I lost a year in my life, a year in the life of my company, I am cranky that my energy level is still really low. I am cranky that I have been unable to travel and that I can barely stay awake past 6 o'clock at night. I am cranky that my once full networking life has almost disappeared and I am cranky that Magnolia is so far away from the rest of the world.

And yet, as I list these words I realize that it is all part of the process and I must embrace that sometimes life takes a different path than I expected. I like to detour in life and this is just one of those times.

It is still hard to accept but I am slowly turning my grumpy mind around. I am happy the days are getting longer and that some day's the sun has been shinning. I am happy that I have an amazing family and circle of friends. I am also very grateful that it feels like when I need something in life to make me think a different way, the universe has a way of making this something show up. Sometimes what causes me to pause and take stock is a book, a few kind words from a friend or a movie among other things. So today I am going to be grateful for my situation and look towards the future. I need a new list of intentions!

Sunday Walking

I am trying to work up the body heat to go outside for my Sunday afternoon walk. It is a bit chilly outside for my tastes but I have my walking partner showing up any minute and he wants to walk to I am trying to prepare. This week was another off week. While my health is getting better, I am still finding it slow to return to normal. I know the doctor said it would take a year and I am way better then I was but COME ON!

Ok enough whining. I am getting better and I need to just slow down enough to realize that taking a year off is not such a bad thing. Plus this week it meant spending the week with my nephew while his nanny was sick. We had so much fun! We took long walks in the park, we watched the construction men working with their diggers, we walked a lot and we got to take some naps together. That's the amazing thing about my life as I am in the midst of recovering. I actually really get to enjoy my time and my life!

So this week I will be making up time in my studio. I am so excited to get back to candle making and creating new candles. I missed being in my studio last week. I was happy to be with Dylan but missed my life in my creative space. In other great news, I have lost 4 pant sizes! I am trying to figure out how this happened and I am still in shock over it but when I went to buy a new pair of pants today I was 4 sizes smaller than I once was. I feel like a child wearing adult clothing. I am swimming in all my old clothes but am not ready to buy new clothes since I have a feeling I will be going down even more sizes. It is nice to start to have my old body back! A lot of my sickness over the last few years and medication caused my to gain A LOT of weight but now I am getting my early 20's body back. Of course it looks a little different but I am just happy to be returning to health!

I wish I had more exciting news but these last few weeks have been very quiet and calm. I think this is a good thing.

Ps. This is my lovely cat that adores how much time I am now home during the day. This is her staring at me in the morning to wake up and feed her!

Waking up to Snow

This morning I could not figure out why my sister was asking if I could come hangout with my nephew. I asked her about his school and all she said was the school is closed. To my spaced out - just woke up brain this made no sense. Of course as soon as I got out of bed and looked out the window I realized why his school had been closed. Last night it snowed! It snowed in the middle of February. It snowed after a week of semi warm weather that allowed hours of walks last week. SNOW?

It was not so bad because the sun ended up coming out to play but it was still a little colder than I like. I am now sitting in my bedroom with a heating pad wrapped around my back. I am still having issues with body temperature and the winter. My back is so fragile now it can not get cold or it will freeze up and cause walking to become almost impossible.

The next area of my cleaning plan is internal. I have cleaned my studio, my bedroom and now I must turn inwards. I have started to increase my fruits, veggies and vitamins in my daily living. I am drinking more than enough water and I have started to detox off my pain medication. I feel like I am starting to gain some control back over my body. Which after a year of my body almost completely breaking down, it is nice to have my health coming back. It was a hard weekend while I tried to get over the detox hump left by the pain medication I have been taking for almost a year. I think I took 10 baths while turning the heat up as high as I could. I thought it would help to sweat out the toxins. I ate apples, bananas and avocados hoping these would help the horrible flu like feeling I had all weekend. I had a "why me" pity party! For the first time since I got sick, I was depressed over it. I usually can get my mind out of the gutter when it comes to my illness but this weekend I was stuck. I thought of all the changes and all the time I have missed while I have been healing. I read blogs of ladies that work all the time on their companies and I get jealous. I felt like I was stuck in a bog. It was a terrible weekend. But finally, this morning I woke up and feel so much better. I think I am finally getting the junk out of my system. I have turned a corner and I am very thankful for this. Detoxing off medications is very hard on the body and mind. I hope to never experience this kind of feeling again.

So hopefully the warm weather will return and I will keep drinking my new favorite smoothies while cleaning out my system and becoming pain free!

Back on the plan

A couple of posts ago I mentioned my three month health plan I had started. After falling off the wagon last week, I am happy to announce that I am back on the plan.

This weekend I participated in Spring Cleaning! I threw out garage, I donated many items and I let go of a lot of items from my past. It felt so good to clean, organize and release. I fully believe that letting go of items that no longer serve you will open up space for new energy to move in. So expect to read some pretty amazing posts in the next few weeks! There is a lot of space now for new and exciting things to happen.

This week I will be returning to the Pool after three weeks of resting. Doctors orders! But I am excited to get back into the pool. I will be taking it slow for the first week but watch out! By next week I will be in the deep end. After the pool I will be in the studio until this evening. I am so happy to be back on my normal schedule. Last month in many ways I fell off the health wagon but when I woke up this morning I realized that I am back on track. I also realized it is ok to fall off the wagon for a while but you have to get back on the wagon as soon as possible. So I am back on my health plan with a clean room, a clean studio and soon a clean body!

Back in the Studio

Today I spent the day making tea lights. It was lovely, warm and calm inside my studio. I had a good rhythm in every step of the process and I even managed to make a couple of the new love candles in glass containers.

This week I am having some ladies over for a night on intention setting and candle making. I am so excited about this evening. I am going to buy loads of apples, chocolates, cheese and a bottle of apple cider. I am off of drinking right now due to my medications for my spine. However, my lovely lady friends can drink all they want! Working on intentions with groups of people is a very powerful way to let the universe know you are serious about what you want to create. I am excited to join these ladies in expressing what I intend to create this year.