Life is revolving around taking my power back and seriously enjoying my life. I am swimming in My Sea of Passions and loving every moment of it.
Yesterday my swimming adventures includes my nephew admitting he did not recognize me after not seeing me for a month because of my body changing. I look different. I am different.
I also have been swimming in my sea of passions by taking care of myself and my health. I am moving around more. I am seeing the people I need to see to help me recover from my car accident and just get back into my body. I am also shopping for the first time in years. I am buying small summer dresses that are making me feel and look sexy. I am being a girly girl and I am loving it. And I am swimming in my sea of passions by eating wonderfully healthy foods and drinking summer drinks. I am still working out daily and losing weight but food is suddenly not the enemy. Food is this wonderful thing that makes me alive and passionate. I am really enjoying the summer bounty and eating less while I am doing it!
I really feel like I am taking my power back. I am happy. I am stable. I am healthy!
There is nothing that can't be done when you feel like this. I have been telling all my friends about my "Swimming in my Sea of Passions" project. I am loving this daily exercise that I have started doing. It feels just right.
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
Sunday, July 14, 2013
Swimming in My Sea of Passion
Swimming In My Sea of Passion is how I am living my life right now.
This morning I found this quote - "One of the secrets is to believe that a good fate is on our side, that the deepest longings of the heart have a special meaning or they would not have arisen within us in the first place" - Marcus Bach, The Wonderful Magic of Living.
Everyday I have started to ask myself "How I am swimming in my sea of passion?". What am I doing that day to make myself happy? This morning my list includes watching Julia and Julie while writing in my journal. I am thinking about how wonderful the party I went to last night was. And I am feeling confident because for the first time in my life, I had a dream last night that one of my Ex's asked me to out for dinner and I turned him down. I turned him down because I no longer wanted to be caught up in his life or drama.
Yesterday Swimming in My Sea of Passion included brunch on the porch of my new favorite restaurant Joule. I was in heaven! Also included yesterday in my swimming adventures was quality time with my girlfriends that have been coming to my rescue to help me over this painful period. I have to say that being back in Seattle, being with my friends, seeing my personal trainer and just getting my life back in order has pushed me from being in pain to seeing the light at the end of the tunnel! I am truly getting over my painful period. In fact I don't even want to speak of it anymore. I want to speak of "Swimming in my Sea of Passion". I want to focus on myself and becoming the kind of woman that I truly admire. Smart, beautiful, passionate, fearless and someone that truly treats herself like she is the her own hero.
One item that I am truly in love with right now is a wish necklace I was given by the owner of this store Local. It is an elegant yet simple necklace of red thread with a tiny silver wishbone on it. You make a wish while you put it own and just leave it on. At some point the necklace will fall off and your wish will come true. All day long I am touching my wishbone and reminding me of my wish. I want to buy one of these for all my friends to share how beautiful this simple idea is but how it has started to guide me all day long. I am reminded to believe in myself and my dreams.
I think I will order a package of these necklaces for my friends and watch how all of our lives change in a beautiful way. If you are ever in the Berkshires you should check this store out. It might possibly change your life!
This morning I found this quote - "One of the secrets is to believe that a good fate is on our side, that the deepest longings of the heart have a special meaning or they would not have arisen within us in the first place" - Marcus Bach, The Wonderful Magic of Living.
Everyday I have started to ask myself "How I am swimming in my sea of passion?". What am I doing that day to make myself happy? This morning my list includes watching Julia and Julie while writing in my journal. I am thinking about how wonderful the party I went to last night was. And I am feeling confident because for the first time in my life, I had a dream last night that one of my Ex's asked me to out for dinner and I turned him down. I turned him down because I no longer wanted to be caught up in his life or drama.
Yesterday Swimming in My Sea of Passion included brunch on the porch of my new favorite restaurant Joule. I was in heaven! Also included yesterday in my swimming adventures was quality time with my girlfriends that have been coming to my rescue to help me over this painful period. I have to say that being back in Seattle, being with my friends, seeing my personal trainer and just getting my life back in order has pushed me from being in pain to seeing the light at the end of the tunnel! I am truly getting over my painful period. In fact I don't even want to speak of it anymore. I want to speak of "Swimming in my Sea of Passion". I want to focus on myself and becoming the kind of woman that I truly admire. Smart, beautiful, passionate, fearless and someone that truly treats herself like she is the her own hero.
One item that I am truly in love with right now is a wish necklace I was given by the owner of this store Local. It is an elegant yet simple necklace of red thread with a tiny silver wishbone on it. You make a wish while you put it own and just leave it on. At some point the necklace will fall off and your wish will come true. All day long I am touching my wishbone and reminding me of my wish. I want to buy one of these for all my friends to share how beautiful this simple idea is but how it has started to guide me all day long. I am reminded to believe in myself and my dreams.
I think I will order a package of these necklaces for my friends and watch how all of our lives change in a beautiful way. If you are ever in the Berkshires you should check this store out. It might possibly change your life!
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Returning home
I have been away from my home for almost a month now. My great uncle died in June and since I already had a vacation planned, I came out early and just stayed. This has been one of the most challenging decisions I have made lately.
There is no comfort in the loss of my routine. I feel stuck out here because I am not moving forward back in Seattle. I watch people that I loved moving forward in their lives and I feel helpless. I am a mixed bag today because part of me wants to return home and move forward, but a larger part of me wants to stay on the East Coast and just ignore my life.
I am fighting very hard not to sabotage my life because I am emotionally out of balance right now. It's an old habit that is not going away. I am working hard to fight it but some days I am weak. Hopefully the comfort of my routine will save me before I mess up too much.
There is no comfort in the loss of my routine. I feel stuck out here because I am not moving forward back in Seattle. I watch people that I loved moving forward in their lives and I feel helpless. I am a mixed bag today because part of me wants to return home and move forward, but a larger part of me wants to stay on the East Coast and just ignore my life.
I am fighting very hard not to sabotage my life because I am emotionally out of balance right now. It's an old habit that is not going away. I am working hard to fight it but some days I am weak. Hopefully the comfort of my routine will save me before I mess up too much.
Sunday, July 07, 2013
Summer of writing
It's with a heavy heart that I return to an old passion of mine. I have been spending a lot of time these last few weeks writing, reading, dreaming and going inward to reveal the pain of my soul and clean it out.
I am reminded of periods of my life where with journal in hand, I would write for hours. I would sit quiet and just pour my soul out on paper. I had visions for my life that needed to be put down on paper. I had dreams that swayed my emotions one way or another. I had broken hearts that consumed my every thought and I had lovers that caused my mind to wander to area's of my soul that they could not touch. I would write for days trying to calm my mind and my soul. I would put together the pieces of my life so that I could simply wake up again the next morning and do it all again.
Why I walked away from this practice I am not sure. Life got complicated. I lost my confidence to push myself beyond the mundane of my daily life. I learned that I was unlovable and thus my words must be insignificant. And I shut down to any of my dreams coming true. I simply had to survive. But my latest heart ache has ripped my soul apart. I am consumed between longing for someone and trying to find myself again. This person has no idea the effect they have had on me. They simply moved on and yet here I am lost at sea and being swept along by the creativity gods. All because I allowed myself to love someone.
It's been a rough time for me but I feel like I am starting to see the light of day again. There is an end to this pain. I can not keep shinning a light in the darkest areas of my soul without clearing out the pain in the process. I can not shut my heart down again simply because I made a wrong decision. And I can not walk away from my voice again because it deserves to be heard. My life is so full of pleasure, of moments of happiness and of discovery that I must put them down on paper.
I am reminded of periods of my life where with journal in hand, I would write for hours. I would sit quiet and just pour my soul out on paper. I had visions for my life that needed to be put down on paper. I had dreams that swayed my emotions one way or another. I had broken hearts that consumed my every thought and I had lovers that caused my mind to wander to area's of my soul that they could not touch. I would write for days trying to calm my mind and my soul. I would put together the pieces of my life so that I could simply wake up again the next morning and do it all again.
Why I walked away from this practice I am not sure. Life got complicated. I lost my confidence to push myself beyond the mundane of my daily life. I learned that I was unlovable and thus my words must be insignificant. And I shut down to any of my dreams coming true. I simply had to survive. But my latest heart ache has ripped my soul apart. I am consumed between longing for someone and trying to find myself again. This person has no idea the effect they have had on me. They simply moved on and yet here I am lost at sea and being swept along by the creativity gods. All because I allowed myself to love someone.
It's been a rough time for me but I feel like I am starting to see the light of day again. There is an end to this pain. I can not keep shinning a light in the darkest areas of my soul without clearing out the pain in the process. I can not shut my heart down again simply because I made a wrong decision. And I can not walk away from my voice again because it deserves to be heard. My life is so full of pleasure, of moments of happiness and of discovery that I must put them down on paper.
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