Finding my North Star

Almost 4 years ago I closed the door on my candle company.  It was a painful process for me.  I realized at the time that I needed to focus on my health and I was in no position to focus on healing while running the company.  I felt like I was being thrown back into the abyss.  I scrambled while facing some very tough circumstances.  I mourned the loss of my company, my best friend and my long term relationship.  

I was lucky enough to be able to pick up a job in the gaming industry and I focused on making it my life.  I worked hard and did everything I could to keep up with the pace while I returned to a healthy lifestyle.   For the last 3 years I have been happy in my current position but wanting more in life.   I reached out for new opportunities but every time it looked like a change was happening, it would disappear right away.   I struggled with what to do in life and realized that I just needed to sit with my life.  I needed to be still and just wait.  Sometimes spirit works when we focus on other things.

I got healthy, I hired a trainer, I dealt with another breakup, school and family situations.   I gave myself space and tried to remain open.  It has not been an easy process at all.  I feel like I am peeling this onion inside of myself and with every layer I look at my eyes burn.  I am forced to face my shadow and work through the process.  It's so painful!  I never imagined that working on my issues could be such a hard process and yet with every layer, I am happier.  I am more free to be open to life.  Once I get over the pain and the process of dealing with a shadow layer,  I am stronger.  I am able to tackle the next block in life and my path starts to clear up. 

I finally can see my next path in life.   My soul is speaking to me and my vision is clear.   I know what I want to do next.  And I am so excited to finally was able to see my next step.  It makes so much sense to me. Everything suddenly makes sense.  School, work, my relationship and the break up, my trainer.  It's all connected!  All of the confusion I have suffered from over the last two years is replaced by energy, vision and purpose.

The Universe works in mysterious ways.   I have a couple of steps to take before I can start my next adventure but I am closer than ever to creating my life exactly how I want it to be.  And to be in  a place where I can truly help other people create their dreams.  And make a living while being able to live in my sea of passions!