Sometimes the Shadow Needs to Come Out

Yesterday I had a realization that has left me spinning in a good way. 

Sometimes the shadow needs to come out.

For so many years I have refused to pay attention to the negative side or the shadow side because I only wanted to pay attention to the positive side of things.  I wanted my energy to go towards what I wanted to attract or manifest in life.  And in most area's of my life this was working but in certain area's of my life, I found myself repeating patterns.  I have been sitting with myself over the last year questioning why I can't break these patterns.  Why it's been years and I keep having the same underlying issue come up.   Yesterday it hit me.  By refusing to state what I don't want in my life, by refusing to state all the awful situations I have been dealt, I was giving these situations more energy than I realized.   I was constantly fighting myself trying to ignore these issues.   I was working hard to hide them thus giving them energy versus just to admit to them and release them.

This realization hit me so hard.  I could see a direct energy connection to all these negative patterns and why I kept repeating them.   It was a direct energy suck.   I immediately created a releasing ritual and finally did what I should have done years ago.   I wrote 4 pages of what I didn't want anymore.  I wrote down everything!  I wrote down what I don't want to be attracted too, what I don't want to put up with, what I don't want to be involved in.  I was so open and honest with myself.  I used all my past relationships as guides of what I do not want anymore.   I then burned the list and prayed to be released from all of these patterns.   They no longer serve me. 

I can feel the shift today.   When I start to think about men from my past or people in my current life that are from this old negative view of what I deserve, I remind myself that this is the old pattern that I am finally giving attention too and I immediately release the attachment.  By refusing to give it attention for so many years I kept recreating this mess until I finally was strong enough to say, enough is enough.   I deserve more.   I deserve more. 

Sometimes you have to shine light into the shadow world to clean it out and realize it is not scary.  That there are lessons in the underworld that you need to learn before you can shift.  And once you shine the light into this space, it no longer has power or hold over you.  It suddenly starts to die in the light and makes room for what you do want.