I got creative

Ok Universe, today I got creative.

We shall see what happens. I sent my resume to a company that I have wanted to work at for many years. It is smaller than where I am working now and more creative.

It is also in a city I have been trying to move to for awhile.

All day long I have been hearing.... Don't give up.....
And I promise I won't.

So I now ask for a little help and guidance.

Don't give up..... Get Creative

This has been my recent lesson.

All of my worries over my job and career are silly. The truth of the matter is that I have more control over the situation than I am giving myself credit for.
I am not stuck in this position forever.

Now is the time when I should trust my instinct and get creative. I need to put my positive life first instead of falling into a life style that is very out of touch with my own. This is part of my life lesson. I need to walk my own path and stay strong in it.

So I just keep thinking... "Don't give up.... Get creative"

What a divine lesson.

I am going to send my resume out to a few select companies and I am going to start focusing the positive path that I walk. I will also open Odessa's Herbals again. I need to get back to my divine gift that I can share and help other people with.

So if you have any desire for a reading or a candle please let me know.

Contact me by my email and we will set up a time to talk.

What an interesting day

Sometimes I am even shocked when doors close.
Or they become further away that I thought.

But then I also feel like my personal world, the world that lives inside of only me, has become bigger, more open and more intouch with nature.

So it is almost summer and I can't wait!

The northwest may lack winters, it maybe cloudy here for too many days in a row but the summers are amazing and I can't wait to relax!!!!

I will post more pictures this weekend.

Nothing much to report

Today was a good day.
I was able to stay grounded and positive all day long. It felt good and calm. Somedays are just days to relax and be calm and today was that day for me.

I wish that I had more to write but I am so tired I can hardly keep my eyes open.

Do what you love

That's my theme for the day.

Maybe it's because my job is not settling well, or maybe it's because the universe has other things in store for me but my attention has really been focused on the questions of what do I love to do and what am I good at?

I am good with people, I am good at being creative, I am good at reading people and situations, I have a natural interest in business and product development. And I am very interested in the proper balance of work and a life outside of work.

This is were my job and I are not seeing eye to eye. For me to be a productive employee I need to feel happy and settled with my life outside of work. That way I can come into work everyday excited, focused and energized. I now come in thinking, I just left here a little under 12 hours ago and I now have another 10 to spend here before I can go home and basically go straight to bed.

This is not healthy for me and the universe wants me to do what I love.

I will let you all know when it happens but stayed tuned. Something big is going to happen!

Here's to a wonderful day!

Here's what we did today in the yeard. I think it looks amazing and is much easier to maintain. However, no more barefoot gardening!

Wicked Site

I was having lunch on Friday with a group of friends who all went to library school and now all work together. They were talking about good site of data catagory systems....blah blah...

But then one of the turned to me and told me about a site call ETSY.
It is an international craft site where you can post and sell or buy crafts made all over the world.

I LOVED IT!!!!

So I thought I would share it with everyone. Plus it has amazing design features, check out the world map.

I am now going to spend the day out in the sunshine since the northwest has not seen the sun in weeks. I will be gardening and spending the day with my aunt who is leaving tomorrow to return to the east coast.

BOO HOO!!!!

40 hours with 10 hours to go

So, I have now hit 40 hours on my time card. Yep, it is Thursday night and I am about to go to bed. I have 10 more hours to the week and then 48 hours of free time.

It is so weird to think about my life in terms of hours. I have never been so aware of hours. I am not sure I care for hours. In fact, I kind of am ready for the flexible work plan.

But, even though right now my life is not as comfortable as I would like it, I have to admit my level of faith, my intuition and my manifesting beliefs are stronger than ever.
I can feel my new life already.

This is the first time in my life where I not only welcome change, I feel like my energy is really creating something more amazing.

I also talked with Elaine this week who confirmed everything I was feeling and thinking.

I know the direction I am going, I can feel it and I am ready.

Decisions

Here is a passage I turned to this morning when I was thinking about my future.

Decisions/Higher Self

"You're faced with many choices and aren't sure what to do.... Fortunately, your higher self can help you resolve these difficult decisions, especially if you're willing to let some of the balls you juggle drop to the wayside for now. The key to making the best choices is to simply follow your heart and attend only to what you care about right now. Focus on priorities that feed your spirit, and don't become overwhelmed by the demands and expectations of others.

Ask your higher self to help you discern and trust in what requires your attention right now, and be willing to disappoint people. Your higher self assures you that what falls tot he wayside isn't important in the long run, despite the drama of the moment. The message for you is "Don't try to be all things to all people, it's a waste of time, and you'll surely fail."

This is exactly what I am feeling and needing to hear.
Sonia Choquette always has a way of doing that.

So I now ask my runners to help me leave one situation in a positive positive way, and to help me find a better place for me to be.

I also realize that this does not mean any manic quick action right now, but when the right time and moment presents itself I will be ready.

Your Heart's Desire Box

My friend Vera wrote about creating a dream box and then posted what was in her dream box.

At the end she asked the simple, yet, not so simple question of,
"What would be in your dream box"

Here my answers that I posted on her site:


I think my dream box would include:
Moving to Scotland.
Having a job as a design manager.
Owning a farm in the country.
Being married and having children.
Always having at least one dog.
Living an abudant life.
Being surrounded by wonderful friends and family.
Always having my intuition in my life.
Owning my own company.


So I am now turning this question over to my faithful readers.
Would would be in your dream box?


Ps. I feel better already.

Garden Party

Today has been the first day that I have been able to do some gardening this spring. It is a warm and hazy day, almost hot.

While I was in the garden I began to feel very lucky for this wonderful house and yard. I realized that for this garden to be able to survive I must care for it and appreciate it.
So while I was weeding I was sending love to all the herbs, vegetables and fruit trees we have because they are going to provide us with a wonderful amount of food this summer.

The other great part about today is that my dog can be totally off leash at our new house. So while I was weeding, she was walking around the garden checking everything out and tasting some of the plants. We discussed her not eating the blueberries but I know how much she loves blueberries so I am going to have to keep an eye on her about that plant. But it was just wonderful to have her walking around me while I gardened. Plus our yard is very private so I can be outside in my worst outfit and no one will see me. I may not do the nude gardening that the home owner used to do but I will be inclined this summer to garden in my bathing suit!

I am off to drink some cold lime water and get outside to do more work.

HOT YOGA

So this week I tried something new. I went with a dear friend to a hot yoga class.
At first I was worried because I am not known for liking heat, nor have I ever done Yoga before.

But I have to say...... I LOVE HOT YOGA.......

I felt so calm and peaceful afterwards.
Plus I felt detoxed!
The detoxed feeeling just added to wonderful feeling. I walked downtown after the class and had a tomato, basil salad and then went to bed. The whole time I just kept thinking, if I did hot yoga all the time I would only want to eat fruits and veggies because after spending 90 mins. in a really hot place you just want water and natural foods.

I think I will add to my list I made the other day:

11. Hot Yoga twice a week.
12. Start working on my heart's desire to move to Scotland.

Why Scotland?
Because this morning I saw an article about Scotland and my heart did a love flip.
I lived in Scotland a couple of years ago and I loved it. More than anything I have wanted in the last 10 years, moving to Scotland has been my number one desire.

This means, I need to start to research and talk to the people that send me "Move to Scotland" emails and make my dream a reality!!!!!

Slowing down

The excitement over the new job is now wearing off and my conference is all done. I have to admit, I am kind of bummed. I feel an emptiness of sorts. Like I went from a fast moving river to a bog.

I also feel the need to make some changes. Must be spring time!

So instead of moping around I think I will list some changes I would like to make in the next few months. This will help me to stop feeling so blue.

1. Start to exercise at least twice a week.
2. Make more candles.
3. Make more movies.
4. Clean my office at home.
5. Organize the new house.
6. Clean the yard.
7. Start to eat outside more.
8. Make new friends- Girlfriend are needed badly! - Please apply to my email.
9. Eat more raw food!--Thanks Vera.
10. Write more on my blog.


Ok, I am feeling better now. I think I can start some of things this weekend.

I had such an amazing week last week that I want to break down all the wonderful things and start to infuse my life with them.

In other more wonderful news... It is spring time in Seattle!
Bring on the long nights and the beautiful flowers!

Some of my moving paintings.....

So a couple of years ago I started to make video art. I was given a copy of a program called ONADIME. This is a music visualization program. I started to upload my photographs and film footage to create what I call a moving painting.
I did not want to make a music video and I would get so frustrated with people because you could never get them to sit down and just watch what happens.

I know that You Tube is not the best way to watch these since they are pretty small. But if you can just listen and watch you will get some sense of the meaning.
Plus if you really want I can send you a copy of DVD.

Below is one of my favorite videos. If you go to this link you will find a couple more. I plan on posting many more over the next few weeks.
Let me know what you think.


ME ON YOU TUBE

My first conference

So last week I helped to organize and set up a professional workshop. This was the first time I had volunteered for an organization on the professional level. I have to admit it- I loved it.

I was able to attend a workshop that was a little out of my price range, I got to spend quality with the people who presented the workshop as well as the people attending the workshop and I was also asked to join the board of the organization that put on the workshop.

This event was one of the most successful things I have ever done in my life. I felt great to be a part of this community and I am ready for more. It was also interesting because I now know I am growing up. There was nothing glamorous about this event. There were no superstars. Instead this was a room full of people who enjoyed what they did in life, who had a specialty and who wanted to learn more. And this aspect of it was what I enjoyed the most.

I guess maybe growing up in Seattle during the grunge area and then watching a good portion of my scenester friends become famous, my views tend to be a little skewed. For the last five years I have really worked on trying to figure out the difference between being happy and being cool. I am not sure both these things can happen at once. I have noticed that you can be cool without being happy but you can not be happy and cool without being happy first. Being happy, smart and interesting all leads one to being cool in my book. But by then most "cool" people will think you are boring. Which I have now realized, does not matter so much to me.

So needless to say, this event in Portland was one of the happiest and coolest things I have ever done! My views on what I want my life to be are changing. And I am becoming a smarter more talented employee while working towards my goal of working for myself.

Plus, isn't it always fun to make new friends?

On the road

I am off to attend a business conference call The Brand Gap in Portland, OR. I have helped to set this event up and I am so excited to attend.

I will give you all the wonderful details this weekend!

A few more picts

So the first picture is of my new Business card. Vera- I can send you one if you want. I needed to get a card for my conference this week. I am hoping in the next few months to get a better card but this will do for now.

The next picture is of a pair of shoes I have been wanting to buy for over a year. As I get older I hate paying full price for things, so yesterday I found the exact pair of shoes I have been wishing to buy and they were more than half off. I just could not pass it up.

I love these shoes!

Needless to say I am very happy. I also figured out a way to fix my camper boots so they will fit.

I am crying as I write this

Well not really but I got so excited about a pair of Camper boots that I put faith into them. Only to realize that all my years of weightlifting and biking around Wisconsin have left my calf muscles too big for the boots.

I have a business conference this week in Portland and I was so excited to be hanging out in my new boots that were more than half off the retail price. Oh.... Why can't companies make shoes and clothes for people a little bigger than a bean pole?

Besides that not much else is going on. I got some business cards made, I got a couple of new outfits for my conference and I went to an excellent lecture on product development and branding last night. It was given by Jody Turner who is President of Culture of Future an international company. It was a very interesting mix of design ideas from all over the world with a dash of optimism for the corporate future and agenda. There was a Q&A at the end of the lecture and it was the first time in my life that I knew so much about the subjects that I wanted to answer the questions.

Hopefully next week in Portland I will have three days of the same thing I experienced last night. I am very interested to see where this conference takes me.

So far so good

Ok, the job is going well. Of course I am exhausted at night and I feel at times my head is going to explode but what else can you do for your few months on the job?

A few weeks ago I wrote about working with Elaine on a energy healing that changed my life. Well, it is still working. I was asked to be on the board of an organization that I am very interested in. It would also be a great networking experience. I am not sure if I can join, I have to see what happens with this job and my energy level but just the fact that they asked made me feel good.

As some of you know, my last few years have been very hard in terms of life and career. I just could not get anybody to respond to me. Not even temp agencies was to talk with me. This is when I started working with Elaine. She helped me to move some issues aside, to clear up my energy and to look forward. I know she did more than this but since I do not know how she does what she does, I just know it works. So all I can really say is she helped me and whatever she does it works!

I feel like Emily 2006 is turning into one of my best years ever!

It is 8:20 at night and I am sad to report that I am off to bed now.

I promise cowboy pictures and stories this weekend.

Little side notes

Ideo has long been one of my favorite companies. This article in Business Week from a couple of years ago helped me to realize that there is such a thing as creativity in the work place, and some companies are getting paid for work that I love to do in my spare time.

I guess you could say this article changed my life.


In other news, I will be going on vacation starting tomorrow. I will be unable to update my blog since we will be in the back country of Oregon. However, I will take plenty of pictures so I can show you just how far in the middle of no where we went.

I also start my new job on Monday. I am not nervous yet. Especially since yesterday I went to buy a first day outfit and I found a Cashmere sweater and Ralph Lauren Tweed jacket that cost $50.00 all together. I have never bought a cashmere sweater for 15.00 dollars but I have to say at those prices I would wear nothing but cashmere if I could. So far all signs point to yes, this is going to be a great start to my new job.

A long lost friend

Ok, so I have a little time to spare since I am on vacation this week.

So here is the link to my first blog.

The Diary Of Helen Wheels

I first started to blog in 2000. I read a New Yorker article about it and thought I would give it a go. It was wonderful! I loved writing and knowing that there were people in the web world that would read what I had written. I was the first of my friends to blog. Everyone thought it was a nutty thing to do but I knew better than that.

So I have taken a couple of years off from blogging. I started other blogs but never found the energy to continue. I think for awhile I lost my voice. Rereading Helen Wheels I am impressed with my writing. I just remember how lost and alone I felt in the Midwest and how writing in my blog made me feel alive and in touch with myself.

So I hope I can bring back a side of Helen Wheels for this blog. Helen Wheels was my secret side. She was the woman that dreamed big and could speak her mind. She was also very thoughtful and could express herself and not be scared.

I have a feeling after this posting this blog may get a little more personal.

It is true, as I have gotten older I do not feel such pain. That maybe because I am in a relationship my search is not as exciting but to be honest. I am now searching to grow up. I am searching to start my own business and to find work that I love. I am still searching for community, a house to buy and a place where I can be surrounded by loved ones.

I still have Helen Wheels in me, she has just grown up a bit. Gone on her wild days. In place is a greater sense of self worth and a brain truly worth it's weight in gold!

Nap Time

I took a rest today and this is what I saw when I woke up. This is Ahmi. She is my best friend. I found her almost five years ago at Evergreen State College. I thought I would give her to my aunt but that fell through because once I took her home she was mine. She would follow me everywhere I went. Nobody could get her attention if I was in the room. So I kept her. She keeps watch over the house and my two cats and in return I make her own food ( red peppers are her favorite treat) and I take her to the woods a couple of times a month where she can run off leash. I think it is a pretty fair trade!

A meatless lifestyle

Today I am starting a new month long vegetarian diet. Right around when I started this blog I also began to realize that my body wanted to stop eating meat. I am making this diet a month long because I do not want to feel like I can never have organic meat again. I just want to slowly move into this lifestyle. However, I am going on vacation this weekend to a crab feed so Seafood will be ok for awhile.

I have two cats and a dog. I love these animals more than I ever knew I could love a non-speaking mammal. These animals may not use words but I always know what they want. And they are smart, really smart. I then began to realize that all the cows I have ever met were very sweet and gentle. And chickens? Well I have never been won over by a chicken but I also get very grossed out when I drive by a chicken truck on it's way to a slaughter house. And last but not least, pigs. I like pigs, they are smart and make funny noises. Dirty, yes! But sometimes on a hot day the thought of rolling around in mud sounds good to me.

So, needless to say, the little voice in my head has been gently guiding me towards wanting to live a more organic and healthy lifestyle. The guidance has been very kind and soft with me. Reminding me over and over again that I love animals, I love the earth and I want to start taking care of animals and the earth, instead of eating tainted meat and non-organic fruits and veggies which will hurt you over the years.

Today is my first day on this adventure. As I prepare to say goodbye to my two best friends as they are moving to Sweden, I have set up a dinner date for us at the wonderful Vegan restaurant Bamboo Gardens. This is our celebration, goodbye and I can not wait to visit you next year dinner.
And it is a gentle start to a new lifestyle for me.

Taking much needed time

So I must admit that these last few months of not having a job have been stressful. I never lost hope but I often wondered what was going to happen. At one point I just gave the situation to the universe and admitted that I had no idea what to do next. At the same time I started working with Elaine from Clear Reflection Coaching .

After two session I knew my energy was changing. I suddenly understood myself better and I knew more about what I wanted. In one sense I felt like I had suddenly grown up but then on the other hand I also felt like a bunch of negative energy was lifted from me and I could now be what I had always wanted to be.

Two days after my last meeting with Elaine I had a week full of job interviews, all coming in on the same week. I went from not being able to get anyone to call me back and having no leads to suddenly having everyone call me at once.
One week after I started the interview process I had accepted an offer from a place I really wanted to work.

I look back at these events and I am amazed at how the universe had lined everything up for me. While I was looking for work I made sure that I keep a clear mind and I began to mediate more. I also started working on my blocks that were holding me back. I was ready for change and I was doing my part of bring it into my life. This is why I think I was able to get a job so quickly and have it be the one I wanted. Because I was finally ready to do the dirty work in my life so the universe could provide me with love and positive changes.

I now feel more connected with spirit and my life. I feel like I am glowing with happiness and love.

I am also thinking it is time to become a vegetarian and non-sugar eater. We shall see.

Life Coaches Rule

Today I met with two friends from Sweden who started talking about life coaches and how amazed they are that their friends in Sweden are starting to get life coaches.

In the last year I met my first life coaches. They are now friends and I have never been coached by them but I have to admit that I love what they do. They also have amazing energy surrounding them, I always feel like I can do anything when I am with them.

My favorite main stream life coach is Cheryl Richardson.
She has truly influenced me to not only want to change my life but to also take those action steps needed to change my life.

Also, her new book, The unmistakable touch of grace, inspired my latest candle called GRACE.
It is a wonderful candle that brings grace into your life and also helps you to be more aware of the grace that touches all of us.